Somebody’s got a case of the Tuesdays

The Good

I’m not exercising my right to bare arms until the divet on my bicep heals. I couldn’t even watch them work on me; it was just too gross. On the plus side- they pumped my upper arm so full of juice I wouldn’t feel it if an F-150 swiped it right now.

For those just tuning in: About two months ago this *thing* suddenly appeared on my upper right arm. It didn’t hurt or itch or anything, and it was very small. Just this teeeeeeny little red scratch-like deal. That bled. A lot. Over the past two months it got bigger and bled more. No explanation. No previous mark of any kind prior to its appearance. There was just… nothing, and then there was something.

Through the connections of a bunch of wonderful people, most of whom I barely know and many of whom I never even met, I was able to get in for free to see a dermatologist this afternoon where I had the *thing* looked at, numbed, and cut out, with the ravine left in its wake cauterized so we all got to enjoy the scent of my burning flesh. I’ll find out in about two weeks when the biopsy results come back if this thing was cancerous or not. :S

The Bad

Speaking of things swiping me, I *might* have been robbed, but I’m not sure…

Every apartment in my building gets a storage unit in the garage. For a long time the wood around the lock on my storage unit was busted– apparently the previous tenant forgot the combo to their lock and decided that instead of cutting the lock off they’d just BREAK THE DOOR to get to their stuff– so I couldn’t keep anything in there very secure since not only could I not lock the unit, I couldn’t even get it to stay closed. For that reason I only ever kept empty boxes in there.

The door was eventually fixed, and I picked up a padlock so I could begin moving things in. I never did get around to putting the lock on, though, because I ended up never actually bringing anything down there except for more empty boxes.

I think.

I feel like I remember a friend of mine helping me bring down a few big Rubbermaid bins last winter, but I can’t be entirely sure if there was anything in them or if they were just helping me get some bulky, empty containers out of my way. I have a call in to him and his wife asking if they have any recollection of that favor, but I haven’t heard back from them yet so I don’t know for certain.

The *headdesk* part, the part that made this potential but as yet unverified theft possible, is that I still never did put the padlock onto the door. I don’t have any good excuse for why I never did that. I just… didn’t.

If I did bring down any containers they were most likely just full of winter clothes and things like that, so there  was nothing of tremendous value lost to whoever (may have) robbed me. But, you know: It’s my stuff, and if it’s worth it to me to keep it then it’s got some value at least. Especially these days when I’m in no financial position to be out replacing things.

So now here I sit unsure if I actually put anything in there or not (because I still have several filled bins and boxes up here in my apartment and don’t know how many I had to begin with), and unable to really verify if I did or not until I hear back from the friends who helped me.

If it turns out that my things were, in fact, stolen, I plan on posting some notes around the building asking for the person(s) who removed boxes/bins from storage unit #17 to please replace them or leave them outside of my apartment door, no questions asked.

I need winter clothes. I’m frizeeeeeezing in here!! It’s 32 degrees outside, and about 56 degrees inside.

Dude: I need a job. O_O Speaking of which…

The Ugly

I’m registered with three different staffing companies and a talent agency, and applying for 3-4 jobs online every day, but still no luck in the ol’ Employment arena. I find this puzzling, to say the absolute least. I’m qualified, I’m honest, I’m loyal, I’m nice (enough), I bathe daily, and I’m available. I know the market is really rough right now, but… but… I still just don’t get it!

Basically: I find it impossible to believe I’m that much less qualified than people already filling positions out there that I know I could do. I mean– think of how many doofuses you work with. (And I know you work with at least a few or else “Dilbert” would never have become as popular as it is.) These are the people you work with who are so annoying and so inept that you complain about them on a daily basis to your significant other, your friends, your family, your bank teller, your grocery bagger… These are the people you know are going to get fired if the boss catches them screwing up, or screwing around, even just one more time.

So here I sit shivering in an apartment I can’t afford to heat, surrounded by furniture I’m taking pictures of so I can sell it on Craig’s List, asking myself: Am I really less suited to be your coworker than people everyone complains about and whose contributions are substandard? Really?!

*Meh*scellaneous #1

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I wrapped my bedroom window in plastic yesterday. One of those 3M Scotch tape window insulator kits. I bought it after last winter for $5 bucks on sale. I don’t know if it’s helping or not, though.

I washed the window frame, let it dry, applied the tape- and pressed firmly!- cut the plastic to size, smoothed it onto the tape, tugged out any wrinkles… and then listened to it pop off as the pressure from the wind coming through the closed window loosened it.

(Series of Expletives Deleted)

At this point I’m kind of wondering if it’s worth it to attempt to insulate the window in the guest room since it’s just as drafty and therefore likely to have similar problems. I’ve been keeping the blinds drawn in there and the bedroom and closet doors closed and hoping for the best. Brrrrrrr!!!

*Meh*scellaneous #2

The show I’m in closes this Sunday. I had a great time with this cast and am really going to be sad to see this one end. Not to mention the fact that there’s really nothing I want to audition for until February, and that’s a long time to be off the boards, you know? Here’s hoping that aud works in my favor or I am going to be one bored little girl come this Spring.

There are really only two shows coming up in the area that I’m looking at auditioning for this Spring, and one of them is likely to have just about the fiercest competition I’ve ever seen. It’s a popular show at a popular community theatre and everyone I know who does comedy is already gunning for a role in it.

I’d be happy taking an added-in part of Assistant to the Assistant to the Assistant Stage Manager and run a Canadian cross or two with a clipboard if that’s the only way I could get into this thing. It just sounds like such a blast.

If only they’d allow me to do the casting. Got a few good ideas up my sleeve… (JIM!!! MATTHEW!!! RICK!!! HINT HINT HINT!!!!!!!)

*Meh*scellaneous #3

You know what else sounds like a blast? A Filet o’ Fish meal. Or maybe just some chicken noodle soup and a pb&j while finishing “The Name of the Rose.” Now if I can just convince myself to get out from under the covers and remove my hat, coat, and scarf long enough to make them… Brrrrrrrr!!!!!

Pantyhose are itchy. Itchy itchy itchy…

Lead Pipe Boots

I just took 35 lbs. of lead to the recycler in exchange for two crisp fives. Fives so crisp you almost want to keep them just so you can marvel at how straight and fine a thing can be that’s hatched from the bowels of the government. Two crisp fives that bought me a gallon of Skim milk, two boxes of generic cereal, a generic frozen pizza, and a plastic tub of grape tomatoes, with a shiny nickel and dime left over for my growing change cup.

Last Night’s Dreams

I’m convinced my neighbors upstairs- the new ones, I think- cannot weigh in at less than 900 lbs. a piece. Around 11 pm they begin tromping up and down the hallway, and don’t stop until about 3 in the morning. Perhaps this is their exercise regime since 900 lbs. is a bit unsightly when towed into the nearest gym?

Dream #1:

In my dream last night I went out in the hallway to confirm that my noisy neighbors were not, in fact, in my floor’s hallway since the noise was just so loud. My hair was wet and I wore nothing but a small, blue bath towel, yet somehow in spite of these facts stepping out into the hallway seemed like a brilliant plan…

When I got into the hallway I saw someone else standing there; a (non-existant) neighbor of mine. He looked to be mid twenties, gelled blond hair, wife beater, kind smile, a bit white trash, and thoroughly unattractive. And I mean really and truly unattractive.

As I struggled to keep my towel on what I noticed was a far nicer version of my body than could ever exist on a non-animated person, my neighbor and I began chatting mindlessly about the neighbors upstairs, how noisy they are, how annoying it is to be woken in the night by their loud conversations and music and stomping. Suddenly it hit me that here I am, dripping wet in a too-small towel I can barely keep closed on this upgraded model of my shivering bod, and this guy doesn’t even notice or care.

Now: because it was a dream I had the luxury of assurance that this wasn’t a result of his being gay, or of his desire to be respectful, or anything like that. This was just some young hetero dude standing here alone with some young hetero chick in a hallway in the middle of the night, not caring in the slightest that her towel is shrinking in direct proportion to how awkward she feels at being so completely and utterly ignored in spite of the fact that she’s 1) practically nude and 2) sporting a totally impossible body most women (animated or not) would kill to have.

Call it pitiful anti-feminism or whatever else you like, but then tell me how you’d feel if the best physical version imaginable of your gender was soundly and completely rejected as attractive, or even noticeable, by a similarly oriented member of your preferred sex.

What the heck am I afraid of? Am I afraid I’m invisible as a sexual being? Am I afraid there’s no possibility of ever being “good enough”? Am I afraid that even if I were an ultra-hot mega-babe that I couldn’t… attract…

Dangit!

“Paging Dr. Freud. Paging Dr. Freud. Your assistance in the F Wing is no longer required.”

Dreams of Being Naked: “In other cases, the dreamer is aware of his or her nakedness but no one else seems to notice at all… [and] just goes on about their business and make no comments. These types of dreams are often manifestations of the dreamer’s fears.”

*headdesk*

In conclusion: This is why I need the company of ferrets.

Dream #2:

The much lighter end of my dream was the part in which I was hanging out with Janelle S. from college. We were the only ones still in the room at some big hotel party and I was explaining to her that I’d just lost my cell phone. We both found this situation hilarious for some reason. Even funnier to us was when she got on the room’s phone with some FBI theft unit and started railing on them for not being more concerned about the loss. She’d cover the mouthpiece to mask our uproarious laughter, and then uncover it to resume her rant about “How would you like it if your phone was missing” and other arguments that only make sense when you’re dead asleep.

We tried explaining what was so funny about it to other guests at the party, but mysteriously enough no one else seemed to find it nearly as amusing as we…

Dreams of Lost Objects: “Hunting or searching for something or someone is related to the symbolism of the specific thing that cannot be found. For instance, lost objects or persons may relate to lost values, aspects of your identity…, unfinished business. You may have lost sight of your goals or direction.”

Other Stuff

I’m not really hungry, but I’m fairly certain that all I’ve eaten today was a single packet of Easy Mac. I guess when you’re not doing anything you don’t really need much fuel. :P

We’re off book for the first half of the show this Sunday. *tugs at collar with index finger and makes “Eeee eeee eeee” face at Rachael and Marlee* I wrote down my scenes on a piece of paper so I could memorize them in chunks, but so far I’m just “really familiar” with them as opposed to “memorized.” And you see how that could be a problem? One of the nice things I discovered upon doing this, however, was that I only actually speak on 50 of those 60 pages. There are another 3 or so where I’m on stage but silent (Woohoo!!), and another 7 where I’m gone daddy gone.

I haven’t even begun to work on the second half of the show. Dear God above…

I picked up MST3K’s Volume 4 four-pack of DVDs from the library the other afternoon. Not a bad selection. It’s got Girl in Gold Boots and Hamlet which I’m just sort of *meh* about. But then it also has Overdrawn At The Memory Bank which is amusing in its badness, and Space Mutiny, my fave of the four.

The only one I have left to watch is Space Mutiny and I’m hesitating to put it in because– well once I’ve watched it what’s left for me to do besides read my lines over and over and over and over and over, polish up my resume and cover letter… again, maybe take a crack at the dishes piling up by the kitchen sink. But then what?

Please, somebody who’s hiring and pays enough: Want Me!

And now, the adorable and talented Ms. Deschanel:

Isn’t she a cutie pie?!

Pick any verb

Three people are having very noisy sex on the other side of my bedroom wall.

I keep coming back in when it’s quiet again, only to find myself back in the living room when neighbor #2 resumes shouting how much she loves it when neighbor #1 [pick ANY verb]s her [pick ANY noun].

I can’t wait to get a condo/house.

:P

Rapid-Laying-Down

“Coming home from very lonely places, all of us go a little mad: whether from great personal success, or just an all-night drive, we are the sole survivors of a world no one else has ever seen.”
John le Carre

Tuesday: Juno
Wednesday: My Knees Were Jumping: Remembering the Kindertransports
Thursday: Silverlake Life: The View From Here
Friday: You Should Be So Lucky

So my rent won’t go up if I get a cat, but I *will* have to pay a $200 (refundable) deposit. And I still might not even be able to get one because it would be my first cat and generally they only let you have a cat here if you already had it. And it must be spayed and declawed. :P

We went out on the boat today after work. It was raining outside, and a bit windy. There was EE from work and his wife and two of their kids, and AS with fishing poles, and my mom and dad. We only went out for about an hour, hour and a half. And now– man I’m exhausted. I was so tired all day today. I had a coupon for a free entree at Noodles so I went there for lunch and then went back out to my car and slept for about 40 minutes.

But it wasn’t really sleep. It was– rapid-laying-down, you know what I mean? Like- I lay down and my heart was racing and I was exhausted and could barely sit back up I was so stinkin’ tired!! But something just wouldn’t let me fall asleep, exhausted as I was. I’m falling right to sleep at night these days. What the heck is up, man?

Flying to Texas on Monday around 12:15 in the morning. Or at least that’s the plan for now. It’d be so much cheaper if we could fly even just one week later. I’m going with one of our techs to pick up a few things from the warehouse down there, and then we’ll be driving it back up in one of our Sprinters we have down there.

What was it like to be in the medical profession in the 80s? All these people suddenly all dying at once of AIDS and nothing you’re doing seems to help at all or make anything better…

Trading Up

I have a neighbor who plays music with a hugely heavy bass line and he plays it so loudly I almost miss the mariachi music outside our windows in Canyon Country. I seriously want to close a door on his head. A couple of times.

Affidavit: Report of child brides led to raid

According to the affidavit, the teen bride reported her husband “beat and hurt her whenever he got angry — hitting her in the chest and choking her — and that while such abuse was occurring, one of the other women in the home would hold her infant child.”

On March 30, the teen called again. She told workers she was last beaten Easter Sunday. Her husband told her if she tried to leave the ranch “she would be found and locked up.”

She said church members also told her if she left the ranch “outsiders will hurt her, force her to cut her hair, to wear makeup and [different] clothes and to have sex with lots of men.”

Boo-frickin’-hoo. Sounds like a trade up to me, man.

Possibly hundreds of billions of barrels of recoverable oil in the Dakotas? Uh… yeah. Let’s do that.

“They will give it a pat on the back and the cow will go away crying.”

“Never explain–your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway.”
Elbert Hubbard

“The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.”
James Baldwin

“Setting a good example for children takes all the fun out of middle age.”
William Feather

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I was so excited about this morning. I got up at the same time I always do, but somehow managed to get out the door seven minutes earlier than usual! I was going to stop for a coffee at McDonald’s on the way in, do a little emailing before work– it was going to be great.

This dream? Dashed to pieces.

I’m in the garage pressing my door opener button, and nothing’s happening. I pull up to the door, hop out, and press the garage door opener that is physically attached to the door itself, and still nothing’s happening. Crap.

I went upstairs to find the number for the facility manager. Got his voicemail. Natch. His message contains an alternate number for emergencies, however, so I call that and get him at home and explain the situation. By this time I’m back downstairs and there’s another girl trying to get out.

So Matt… or Mike… I think it’s Matt… walks me through where the maintenance ladder is kept over by the boiler, which cord on the door to pull, which part will swing down when it releases so I’m not standing under it, which this to pull, which that to push, and then I’m supposed to physically lift this massive, industrial garage door. :P

So I get the ladder out and the other girl gets out of her car (To see if I need help? To mop the sweat from my brow? To commiserate?) when we hear the mechanism for the door make some internal whirring sound. I’ve just put the ladder in place so I take it down and we both run in case it’s someone about to drive in from outside- you know, like maybe their controller was able to activate the door?- but luckily there was no one there. The fool thing had just started working on its own. For no reason. When no one was pushing any buttons. :S

So I put a dust pan in front of the sensor to keep the door *propped* open and we both took off before it might decide to just close for the heck of it the same way it had just arbitrarily opened with no coaxing.

And that’s why I was late this morning. I promise.

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Florida School Security Officer Tasers 11-Year-Old Girl: What’s’a matter with people? Who taught that girl she could behave that way? *sigh* Read the article. Bitch had it coming to her.

Lawyer: Woman Forced to Remove Nipple Rings at Airport: This is stupid and embarrassing. What decade are these TSA agents stuck in? #1 for requiring her to remove them, and #2 for laughing about it. Idiots. Poor woman…

FOUND: In Hevan: Sad. Sweet. Us.

FOUND: Hi! My Name Is Freedom: Funny Comments.

Women Are People Too: What Susan B. Anthony knew that Gloria Steinem doesn�t.

Dallas Can’t Close Strip Club Where Girl, 12, Danced: I know some girls can look pretty mature even at a very young age, but come on! 12?! How tall was this chick and how huge were her boobs that *anybody* mistook her for being 18??

Raul Castro: Cubans Can Have Cell Phones: I– what? They couldn’t have cell phones before? What? How can– what?! *Gah!*

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I can’t get over this guy. I can’t figure out what to think. I know he’s a YouTube *celebrity* and whatever for being… like this… but how do this many people sit through this many of his videos this many times for him to ever achieve this celebrity? YouTube… what a strange…

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Breakfast: Water, Cheddar Cheese Sandwich Crackers, Water, Coffee, Water

Lunch: (Unintentionally) Soft Boiled Egg Salad on Super Duper 89 Seed Mega-Dense Flax Colon Blow Bread (Official Name), lemonade

I’ve consumed so much water the past few days it’s a wonder the town’s not issuing shortage notices.

*I will be healthy I will be healthy I will be healthy I will…*

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Ladies: Another try for tonight? Movie or something at my place? I have “The Darjeeling Limited,” “Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger,” and “Scrooged,” and a hankerin’ for some Topper Stix, speakin’ o’ being healthy…

RIP: Neil Aspinall

Sad news. Neil Aspinall died last night. He was in almost every story I ever read about the Beatles/Apple Corp. Good guy.

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The neighbor’s alarm started going off at 1:30 am. That’s a first. It used to go off some time around 4:30 am… then at midnight… now 1:30 am.

I lay there listening to it for about five minutes, hoping and praying it would be shut off so I could get back to sleep.

No such luck.

Finally I pounded on the wall. Five seconds later I heard the sound of someone getting up and walking. Within three seconds the alarm had stopped. I shouted “Thank you!” and grumbled inwardly at the fact that whoever this is they were within mere feet of this alarm- obviously, since they were able to shut it off almost immediately- and that they have just been laying there listening to it beep, night after night, probably since I first moved in a year ago.

Idiots.

>:|

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And now: quotes, because I am too lazy to write anything else, and these are interesting, and I’ve included them all before…

There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him. – Robert Heinlein

Where morality is present, laws are unnecessary. Without morality, laws are unenforceable. – Anonymous

A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. – G. Gordon Liddy

To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical. – Thomas Jefferson

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it’s free. – P.J. O’Rourke

One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. – Plato

After a shooting spree, they always want to take the guns away from the people who didn’t do it. I sure as hell wouldn’t want to live in a society where the only people allowed guns are the police and the military. – William S. Burroughs

You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves. – Abraham Lincoln

The Revolution will be complete when the language is perfect. – George Orwell, 1984

… the next revolution… will be when those who work refuse to support those who don’t. – Walter Hickel

Choose loss rather than shameful gains. – Greek proverb

To entrust the government with the power of determining the education which our children receive is entrusting our servant with the power to be our master. – David Nasaw

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Watching Door to Door with William H. Macy, Helen Mirren, and Kyra Sedgwick. I just started and so far it’s good, it’s just… kinda heartbreaking…

Felicity Huffman has a little cameo in it as well. That was unexpected.

And where do they find so many old cars to stage in the background on these shots?