“She’ll breed and like it, like everyone. Well, almost everyone.”

I’m watching “A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum” and having a hell of a time figuring out why in the world this thing has remained so popular for so long. There’s just NOTHING funny in this.

I mean: I can muster a chuckle or two for occasional ENORMOUS, ham-handed ridiculosity, mugging, and unattractive middle aged men in chiffon, but there is seriously not a single role in this I would EVER want to play- or see played- ever ever ever, no matter how good of a singer I was, no matter how good I looked in a toga. If we’re friends and you’re in this, you owe me two drinks before the show and three drinks after if you think you’re gonna get me to see you in this thing. I think Buster Keaton himself would actually have to make an appearance as the near-sighted father for me to even consider attending a live production.

Is it just better– is it funny *live*? Is that it? I can see how it could be better live. But “good”? I don’t know, man. I just don’t know…

I rented it from the library today after work figuring it was probably a good idea that I have some clue as to what it’s about since it’s still put on often enough that I’m likely to run into it at some point. God bless me I now know better than to audition sight unseen.

Alfred didn’t like it either.

Now I’m putting in “Barefoot in the Park” because I can’t be bothered to read that either, and Lord knows I’ll audition for this some day. Might as well know what it is I’ll be auditioning for.

So far the song playing under the opening credits makes me want to don a leopard print dress, a wide belt, and a perma-tini in my drinkin’ hand. Ick.

Also: I never noticed how much Brad Pitt and Robert Redford look alike. And how much Robert Redford doesn’t do comedy like he knows what’s funny. And how much he can’t seem to kiss Jane Fonda like they’re both the same species. Ah, but who can really kiss Barbarella the way Barbarella needs to be kissed?

“Paul I’m going to be a lousy wife. But don’t be angry with me. I love you very much. And I’m very sexy.”


I’m having a hard time with “BitP.” In part because Jane Fonda is totally cute in it but I’m only int he mood for so much cuteness right now, and in part because I’m afraid this will be me and my new husband one day. :P

“I feel like we’ve died and gone to heaven… only we had to climb up.”

Fine fine fine… In other news: body sushi. I want sushi. I do. I just don’t know that I want to eat it off of a naked person. Don’t oils from their skin get into the rice? And I imagine they have to keep the space fairly warm to accommodate the nudity, so what about the possibility of them sweating in my salmon??

How to get rid of headaches.

And now, I’m off to make asparagus and just *listen* to the movie from the other room. God. This husband. What an awful, thankless, boring role. Icccckkkkkkkkk.


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