Lyrics from “New Math” by Bo Burnham, a 17 year old boy whose gift for clever lyrics reminds me of a combination of Jason Powell and Rick Katschke for some reason.

And no, I do not mean to imply by omission that that “reason” is pedophilia (see below).

In conclusion, watch the video. Or don’t. But it’s kinda funny. So you should.

Um… How ’bout we just get back to the part where I provide a copy of some of the lyrics…

“Havin’ sex is like quadratic expansion
if it can’t be split then it’s time to stop,
and havin’ sex is like doing fractions,
it’s improper for the larger one to be on top,
and havin’ sex is like math homework,
i do it best when i’m alone in my bed.
and squarin’ numbers are just like women,
if they’re under thirteen just do them in your head….”

Ahh… Good times.

Rehearsal for “Wait Until Dark” is going well. I’m off book for my first scene… basically… and pretty comfortable with my lines for most of the rest of the show. It’ll be good to finally get that book out of my hands so I can put more of my focus on maneuvering through the set. I’d like to try running the show blondfolded a few times so I can… Did I just write “blondfolded“??


Yes. Yes that’s what I want to be. Blondfolded.

Yours truly,

Porphyria’s Lover

Goodnight everybody! You’ve been wonderful! (Exit, pursued by a bear)

ETA: WAIT!! I almost forgot about the two pictures I wanted to post! Egad! DISASTER WAS NEARLY UPON US!

The first is a screen shot of an ad that appeared in my Yahoo account yesterday.

I believe the implication is that the rockin’ hot awesome left ass cheek/thigh area is somehow not as rockin’ hot and awesome as the ass cheek/thigh area on the right.

Are any of my straight male or lesbian readers understanding this better than I am?

And do you even see the “dimples” they’re referring to? It looks like maybe she brushed quickly against an end table in need of a bit of dusting, but is that– is that cellulite?

If this stuff will make my legs look like EITHER of the legs in this picture, I will pay so much money for it RIGHT NOW.

I– I’m still kinda scratchin’ my head on this one, folks. I’ll get back to you if I figure out what they’re getting at here.

The next picture is just something I thought was kinda funny.

I was looking up a last name on Facebook when i found two guys in a row with the same exact name (and it’s an unusual-ish last name), both from the UK, and both facing the same direction and drinking a beer in their user pics.

“You are not special.

You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake.

You’re the same decaying organic matter as everything else.”

Tyler Durden

Okay. Now I’m ready to go.


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