Movies

Philip Seymour Hoffman


He will always be Philip Seymour Hoffman to me.

My various dashboards are currently filled with Tweets and excerpts from interviews with people who worked with the man, who knew him personally, who called him Phil.

Phil Hoffman.

And I don’t know what to do with that.

Phil Hoffman sounds like he should be a branch manager for an inter-state credit union. He should be the person in charge of scheduling equipment deliveries to construction sites. He should be the consulting accountant brought in by the local zoo as a temporary addition during tax season, his final paycheck mailed in an envelope thick with parking passes and free admittance lanyards for his kids.

A guy named Phil Hoffman would definitely have kids.

Philip Seymour Hoffman had kids. Three of them. Had a long time partner, a woman named Mimi O’Donnell. He was an actor, a director. He was loved, he was respected. He seemed happy, excited about his work. He was passionate about what he’d found to do with his life. He was an artist. He won awards. It was inspiring.

I hope eventually I will remember him only for those things. They are worth remembering. They are worth lauding. They hold up to the status and the weight of being an all-three-names celebrity.

But I’m not there yet. I acknowledge those things, I am in awe of them, but I cannot divorce them from the subject of today’s tweets and interviews: Today, February 2, 2014, Philip Seymour Hoffman died alone in the bathroom of his Manhattan apartment of a heroin overdose; a partner, a father, and an artist known to his fans by all three names.

I can’t believe he’s really gone.

And I don’t know what to do.

“It’s always summer in the songs.”


(Linked site is spoiler heavy. Proceed at your own peril.)

Date. The Right. People.

I cannot stress the importance of this enough, folks.

Not only will you gain much higher caliber mutual friends if you date someone you honest-to-God believe is cool, but everything afterward will also be way better when years later you’re still friends with them and with their super cool wife and the two of them mail you a “pop culture care package” out of the blue for absolutely no reason whatsoever thereby causing a beautifully sunny day to suddenly feel that much brighter and amazinger.

You: What comes in a “pop culture care package,” Ruth?

Me: That’s… a little nosy, don’t you think?

You: I don’t– You said you got this package thing and I’m just wondering what’s in it. You’re going to, what, just not say? *pause* Is this a control thing?

Me: A control thi…? No! No. I just don’t feel like I should have to tell you things just because you ask. Or– Did you ever think maybe I wanted to tell you what was in it but that I wanted to be able to volunteer the information instead of having you drag it out of

You: Drag? Whoa, how was that “dragging”–

Me: Yes, drag it out of me. Maybe I wanted to give you the information, huh? You know? Maybe I wanted to give it. To gift it.

You: Okay, you know what I think? I think this is a control thing and that for someone who keeps a public blog you are taking your privacy way too seriou-

Me: DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT’S IN THE BOX OR NOT?

You: *close tab*

Right then. Now that we’re alone…

Or "P4k" if you prefer your sweaters threadbare.

CDs
Nick Jaina‘s The Beanstalks That Have Brought Us Here Are Gone
Yeasayer‘s Odd Blood
Portugal. The Man‘s In the Mountain In the Cloud
Vampire Weekend‘s Contra
Fleet FoxesHelplessness Blues
Elbow‘s Build A Rocket Boys
The Black KeysBrother

I’m hoping to take a road trip to Montana later this fall (*crosses fingers* *hopes really hard*) and was psyched about all the new music I’d have to listen to during the drive out there after my trip to HPB yesterday. And now with this new stack of CDs? Yeah. This is officially the best road trip soundtrack ever.

Let me know if you want to schedule a speakerphone call with me during the drive. (Rates double during peak hours. Now accepting cash and Paypal. Requests to skip ahead will not be honored.)

(Linked site is spoiler heavy. Proceed at your own peril.)

DVDs
MST3K, Volume 18 (featuring one of my all time faves, Jack Frost)
Game of Thrones, Season 1

Game of Thrones is HBO’s attempt at creating something which could in some way measure up to the incredible work of fiction that is A Game of Thrones, the first book in the seven book series of George R. R. Martin’s gift to the world, the A Song of Ice and Fire series. The HBO series may very well be awesome, but I wonder if it could ever truly match the heights or the depths to which my imagination traveled when reading the book itself.

By which I mean, of course: OMG I AM SO EXCITED OMG OMG I CAN’T WAIT TO PUT THIS IN AND WATCH ALL OF IT ALL IN ONE SITTING GAHHHHHHHH OMG OMG!!!

Note I Want To Frame Because Friendship Makes Me Happy
“This pop culture care package is courtesy of Laura & James. Enjoy!”

I have to admit I am in a bit of a pickle over getting started on the DVDs, however. I’m just over half way through watching Moonlighting, which will be due back at the library soon. While I know the DVDs I received today are wildly awesomer than anything that could possibly befall Maddie Hayes and David Addison in the remaining episodes of the 80s favorite fourth-wall-buster, I’m hesitant to start something new that I know I won’t be able to turn off until it’s finished, thus guaranteeing me overdue fines for hanging on to the tales of the Blue Moon Detective Agency longer than is allowed.

On the other hand, I received these DVDs for free. I could consider any potential late fees to be the “cost” of ownership. Yeah? Yeah?? Yeah.

All right, then. Lay it on me, HBO…

*************

The rest of this post is for James and Laura…

*************

OH MY GOSH YOU GUYS ARE ABSOLUTELY THE COOLEST! This box seriously made my day! I went to leave my apartment and saw the package leaning against my door and I was so confused because I couldn’t remember ordering anything. And then I opened it and  my jaw dropped and I got all Kristen Stewart breathe-y before jumping up and down all over the living room trying not to drop everything as I zipped through the stack of discs! So exciting!! :D Let me know if you want to come over and watch any of this with me. I just picked up a bunch of frozen pizzas and Diet Mt. Dew this afternoon. You can park in the lot or anywhere out on the street. OMG OMG OMG I AM SO EXCITED! YOU GUYS ROCK SO HARD!!!

*The title of this post is taken from Martin’s A Clash of Kings. “Winter will never come for the likes of us. Should we die in battle, they will surely sing of us, and it’s always summer in the songs. In the songs all knights are gallant, all maids are beautiful, and the sun is always shining.” – Brienne

Clue Remake?


Miss Scarlet, Col Mustard, Mrs. White, Mr. Green, Wadsworth, Prof Plum, Mrs. Peacock

I was watching Clue for the 239th time last night when I started thinking how truly awful it would be if it someone were to remake it.

It’s not just that Hollywood can’t be trusted to refashion a classic comedy like this without dumbing it up with a bunch of hot-bodied, unfunny 24 year olds recently spewed from the Disney Machine. There’s also the fact that the actors who played the roles in the original created such completely iconic characters that seeing anyone else play these parts would leave audiences (read: me)  feeling like something was missing.

I mean– Harrison Ford’s not the greatest actor of all time, but when somebody else gets chosen to play Han Solo in a remake of the original Star Wars trilogy there’ll be mutiny! Actually, I think a remake alone would cause riots…

I fear the announcement of a Clue remake is only a matter of time, however. Particularly as the 25th anniversary of the original December 13, 1985 release date nears. (And yes, I will be throwing a Clue party. Start working on your costumes now, folks.) If/when the (inevitable/horrifying) remake announcement is finally made, who would you want to see cast in each of the parts, and who would you want to see direct?

Better yet…

The classic comedy Clue is being remade and it’s your job to cast the movie and pick the director!

When did you get so cool?

THE RULES

  1. Every character must be assigned an actor to play that part (see below for a full list).
  2. All potential actors and directors must be living and feasibly usable (ie. No tapping Roman Polanski to helm the project).
  3. No casting from Gossip Girl or its ilk. (If you have to ask if a particular show/movie qualifies as being Gossip Girl-y: It qualifies.)
  4. Megan Fox is out, out, out.
  5. So are Christina Applegate, James Marsden, and Matthew McConaughey.
  6. If your chosen cast is deemed too attractive you will be forced to make a trade. (Ex. If Angelina Jolie, Scarlett Johansson, Brad Pitt, and Tyrese Gibson are all in your cast: It’s time to make some trades.)
  7. If the comedic skill of your chosen cast is deemed questionable, you will be forced to make a trade. (Ex. If Lindsay Lohan, Steven Seagal, and Nicholas Cage are all in your cast: It’s time to make some trades.)
  8. It is not necessary to select additional personnel (Executive Producers, Cinematographers, etc.) for the movie. It is, however, allowed (Jennifer Champagne).

THE CHARACTERS (Original Actors, Age during filming)

For extra credit you can cast solely from people you follow on Twitter, fave YouTubers, coworkers, local actors, or varieties of cheese. (Beers and breads of all densities are also welcome.)

Now get casting!

ETA: Getting some terrific responses– you guys rock at this! Just wanted to post a link to oceandoot on LiveJournal who fleshed out his response with pictures and quotes.

“All things on earth point home in old October”


Wesley and Brodie

Wesley and Brodie

Ferrets. I haz them.

Since my last post I’ve taken on two new roommates, Wesley and Brodie. They’re both pretty quiet, disarmingly funny, and don’t eat much, though they do take an odd pleasure in pooping in inaccessible corners, so there is something left to be desired.

That’s right, folks: I finally got ferrets! And aren’t they cute?! They belonged to my friends Nikki and Jessie who weren’t able to keep them when they moved so now they’re living with me. Er– the ferrets are living with me, that is, not the girls. Wesley is the white and silver one in the front, the smaller of the two, and Brodie is the sable one in the back.

I’ve tried taking some *action shots* of them but Wesley’s usually rummaging around behind something, and I can only ever seem to catch Brodie when he’s running off to the next exciting thing on his agenda so his pictures are just a lot of tail shots. And naturally when they’re doing flips over each other in the middle of the room my camera is nowhere to be found. I don’t mind not getting any good pictures so long as I can soak up all the cuteness in person, but how unfair of me to hoard it all for myself!

Pumpkin Hunting

Beautiful Autumn

Beautiful Autumn

I went pumpkin hunting with the family at the Elegant Farmer in Mukwonago yesterday. There were no pumpkins left in the field to be had by the time we got there, but there were more apples left on the trees than a body could pick in a week, and the smell of cider donuts was everywhere, so if you’re headed there yourself there’s still lots to do. In the end all we bought was a caramel apple pie and OMG: delish. Their pies are amazing, and if you’ve never had one you need to plan a trip out that way this weekend. No Halloween party (the chatting kind, not the drunken kind) could not be improved by the addition of one of these pies. Mmmmm….

Unfortunately Bekah and Andrew were busy with Andrew’s family yesterday so they weren’t able to make it, but David and RAM were there, along with Mimi who was up from Chicago for a couple of days, so it was still a two car afternoon.

The weather was exactly how you’d wish you could truthfully describe a beautiful Fall day. Sweet, high clouds, clear sunshine, a light breeze. In fact it was so warm we walked outside for the better part of an hour with no coats on  and wishing we’d left our sweaters at home.

During our walk  past the apple orchard and the cornfields to the pumpkin patch we passed a small, stone out-building. It bore with some difficulty a collapsed wooden roof and a stone bathtub of sorts inside. The roofer in me couldn’t help but take a few leak pictures for my dad. You know how we do:

DSC04802 DSC04803 DSC04804 DSC04806 DSC04807

My parents took more group pictures but neither of them has posted any of them anywhere yet so I’m still waiting to see how they turned out. I will definitely post a few here as they come in, though. Such a beautiful day, such beautiful, smiling faces. I took some video during our walk. The wind underscoring the whole thing is a bit grating, but watching it makes me happy. :)

Theatre

Not doing a durn thing with it right now and I have to say I’m glad of it. Busier with life stuff than most Falls. Not seeing many shows either, but I’m not totally removed from the circle. I get out there every now and again.

Writing

I’m compiling some pieces. My fic. My non-fic. I’ve read it all so many times I can’t stand the sight of most of it anymore and fear there’s nothing salvageable. I do need to save something of it though, and have had some very helpful feedback from my two “readers.” But it’s decision time: Do I pursue fiction or non-fiction? Not forever. Just for now. For soon. For the time being. For this current project. I have to pick one or the other and run with it. Not forever. Just for now. For soon. For the time being. For this current project. Fiction or non-fiction? Where am I stronger? Ugh. I’m bored with myself just thinking about it.

Ugh.

Half Price Books

How much do I love that place? Oh God. So much. I dare you to prove to me your Half Price Books is better than mine. You will fail. Mine is the awesomest.

Within the past month I have purchased from them:

The entire series of Escaflowne on VHS (8 tapes) for $3
A&E’s Pride and Prejudice on VHS (6 tapes) for $2
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s The Little Prince for $1
Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat, Pray, Love for $1
Lewis’s The Chronicles of Narnia (paperback anthology) for $2
Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird for $6
Donald Miller’s Blue Like Jazz for $1
McLaren and Campolo’s Adventures in Missing the Point for $2
George R. R. Martin’s Dreamsongs Volumes I and II for $2 each
More CDs than I can remember, none clocking in higher than $3 and most coming in at $1

The day they have seasons of Maude available for purchase is the day I make public my desire to speak my wedding vows from the confines of their Drama/ Poetry/ Writing/ Pop Culture aisle. Stand near kiddie lit, ladies: That’s where I’ll be aiming the bouquet.

squeee

Awww…

Ooh! Ferret interruption: *Squeeee!* They’re so cute when they’re sleeping! Right now they’re curled up yin-yang style on a pillow case on the top shelf in their cage with their teeny little necks intertwined so their faces are side by side. So cute!!

Wesley keeps getting up, running down into the bedding in the bottom of the cage to scratch, and then running back up to lay forcibly down on top of Brodie, who responds by yawning. At most. Don’t you just love it? If I didn’t fear rolling over on the poor guys in my sleep, or waking up in the morning to corner poop, I’d totally hang a hammock for them in my bedroom.

Happy Fall Everyone!

“All things on earth point home in old October; sailors to sea, travellers to walls and fences, hunters to field and hollow and the long voice of the hounds, the lover to the love he has forsaken.”
Thomas Wolfe

The title is the hardest part


Had an audition today. My hopes are low, but it was great getting out of the house, out of the ‘sha. They said they’d let me know one way or the other fairly soon (my last audition with them they let me know the very next day), but I think I already know…

The upsides? Auditioned opposite an awesomely talented actor, two very nice, pretty, and far-cooler-than-I women chatted with me in the lobby, and the woman directing the show hugged me hello. I know nice people do nice things like that to everyone all the time, but when I spend so much time by myself and then meet those nice people and they do those nice things to me it just throws me completely for a loop and makes me happier than I can stand and I absolutely love it.

bella-caffe-cases

Inside Bella Caffe'

Met up with Parmanifesto at Bella’s afterwards. For as excited as I get at the prospect of seeing him you’d think I’d make ways to do so more often. *sigh* I am a lazy ass. Anyway- while there I enjoyed a yummy (but pricey!) pumpkin spice latte, the last several swallows of which I had to leave behind in my cup because they were *chunky,* for lack of a better word. It was fantastically hot and tasty up ’til then, though. But boy that’ll teach me to splurge when I really can’t afford to do so; the real thing is rarely as good as one’s memories of it. :P

*Geh* My hands still reek from pulling mounds of wet, sloppy onions off the turkey sandwich I bought there. *shudder* What’s wrong with people?! Onions? Piles of them?? On an otherwise delicious sub?! Boggles the mind.

Which way?

Which way?

Stopped at the library on the way home. First thing to greet me was a $20 bill lying in the middle of the main entryway. I brought it to the front desk so the owner could claim it and apparently if no one does so in the next 30 days then they call me up and the twenty is mine. Woo hoo! That’s heat for a week! :D

Picked up a PBS documentary on Frank Lloyd Wright and “Parlez-vous Francais? Learning French: The Basics.” Here’s to a rockin’ good time in front of the TV with Alfred tonight. Perhaps even better than last night’s “Murder, She Wrote” 4 episode marathon, including the Season 3 “Magnum PI” crossover. Ooh that Jessica Fletcher. She’s a crafty old gal!

I currently owe the Waukesha Public Library $6. $2 for a documentary about the Kindertransports, $3 for a documentary about living with/dying of AIDS in the 80s, and $1 for a Vincent Price flick. Yeesh.

Had an interview for an office job yesterday afternoon. Remembered to remove my nose stud and put my phone on silent. Two points for me! The typing test, which featured a missing-word-typo, threw me a bit by requiring a double space at the end of each sentence, and the Excel test marked two of my answers wrong in error. And the Word test? Don’t get me started. What year of Office is this test based on? The 1965 punch card roll out? It went well all-in-all, though. The place is less than 3 miles from my apartment, (Joy!), and the position starts at 8:30 am and lets out at 5 (Rapture!). They said I’ll know within a week or so if I got the job or not. Here’s hopin’.

This onion smell is making me sick and my coffee breath is positively rancid. It’s times like these I’m glad I live alone so I don’t start losing friends over my inadvertent pungency.

A Sexy, Star-Studded Wordle


WordPress keeps tabs for you on what terms people search for in Google that bring them to your blog.

I am a big fan of Wordle.net.

Slap those two together and: Ta-Da…

sex-and-celebrities-wordle1

Above is a word art image I created by pasting in every celebrity and “blue”  search term that has brought people to my blog into the “Create” box at Wordle.net. It’s interesting to me to see what people are looking for, and who they’re looking for, from the seeming privacy of their home computers. It’s a strange thing being able to take a peek at that. For reference’s sake I’ve included a copy of the “pasted searches” in list format below. Fascinating.

And not just a little creepy.

And for those of you wondering: The bulk of the search terms (647 total as of the date of this post) that bring people to my blog have to do with ferrets, dunlap syndrome, theatre, names of people I’ve acted with, and quotes from Carrie, Death at a Funeral, Hellboy 2, and Waiting For Guffman.

Yep. My blog’s a veritable treasure trove of information on the tippiest toppiest of intellectual pursuits.

Without further ado, the list I used to create the above image:

aishwarya rai
beer girl images
belly flab (exact search appears 3 times)
boob growth videos
flat chest
flat chest girl
forgi sex
girl belly flab
girl naked outside
heavy legs
hot hot body image
itchy pantyhose (exact search appears 5 times)
jake gyllenhaal
jennifer aniston (exact search appears 2 times)
jessica alba exposed
jessica alba my space
jessica alba naked
jessica alba sex
jessica alba sex wallpapers
jessica alba wallpaper
jessica alba xxx (exact search appears 5 times)
jessica aniston bare arms
jessica de alba
karen kay 3rd shift
karen kay third shift
karen kay third shift pictures
kyra sedgwick
megan fox (exact search appears 2 times)
megan fox acne scars (exact search appears 7 times)
megan fox has bad acne scars
megan fox peoplepost
megan fox unclothed
megan fox’s picseries
nude flat chested females
nude photos karen kay third shift
omg jessica alba
pantyhose (exact search appears 7 times)
pantyhose and boots
pantyhose in the shower
pantyhose itchy
pantyhose or tights or stockings or nylons
pantyhose required
pantyhose zoey
porn page
porn_y
rape
see through shirt jessica alba
sex xxx jessica alba
sexualviolence.tv
show free clips of women wearing jeans so tight a guy can hardly put his hand inside them
skinny actresses (exact search appears 2 times)
street harassment
super-skinny naked lesbians
third shift karen kay
tori spelling (exact search appears 5 times)
totally nude girls
undressed women porn pics
xxx wallpapers
xxx wallpapers of actress
zoey deschanel (exact search appears 8 times)

For a total of: 1 search a piece for Aishwarya Rai, Jake Gyllenhaal, and Kyra Sedgwick; 2 for Jennifer Aniston (+ 1 for “Jessica” Aniston); 4 for Karen Kay (the sports radio announcer, I’m assuming, and not the romance novel author); 5 for Tori Spelling; 9 for Zoey Deschanel; 13 for Megan Fox; 15 for Jessica Alba; and 18 for pantyhose

I think it’s interesting to note that when searching for Megan Fox, arguably to many the most attractive person on this list, people are searching for her in conjunction with alleged physical blemishes (ie. acne scars) more than half the time (8 out of 13 searches). What does this say about “we the searchers”? Thoughts? Opinions?

I love technology. Always and forever.


(The first portion of this entry was originally written 11/10/08.)

When you’re unemployed and no one cares where you are, there’s no reason to be up at 7 am on a Monday morning.

But by golly I was.

I didn’t even get up that early when I had a job…

born_into_brothels_lrgI’m on my third movie for the day after visiting Blockbuster and the library. The first was too embarrassingly poor to mention, so we’ll start with number two, a documentary called Born Into Brothels. It follows American photographer Zana Briski‘s time spent in the red light district of Calcutta. In it she befriends the children of prostitutes and teaches them photography, helps a few of them get into schools, and sends one for a week long trip to Amsterdam to… study art? Ice skate? I don’t recall exactly what the base purpose of the trip was…

Interesting to see that side of the district through the viewfinders of a bunch of children, but so heartbreaking to see in the end how many of them either gave up the opportunities to get away from those hardships, and those who had these new opportunities taken from them by their guardians. And why do these guardians take these opportunities from their children? Because they need to keep them close to help make money? Sure. And out of jealousy of their potential to get away from the life that has already taken their own youth and destroyed them? Ah… Perhaps…

Maintaining the Indian theme of the evening I’ve moved on to The Mistress of Spices. I got it because I want to be Aishwarya Rai when I grow up, just– not Aishwarya Rai as she is in this movie. Yawn. The other downside of the movie is Dylan McDermott. Bigger yawn. The one upside is Zohra Sehgal. That woman could appear in every movie I ever see from now on and that would not be enough. She just looks and acts like someone you want to love.

***********************************************************

All righty dighty. Back to the present.

Just closed weekend number two of “The Philadelphia Story” at the Waukesha Civic Theatre. It’s been going really well, and I have to say I’m shocked at the  number of friends of mine who’ve come to see the show. I never have this many friends in attendance so it’s literally one *wow* after another when I step out of the green room to see who’s out there. It’s just so much more fun to get up there when you know you’re sharing the fun with people you actually enjoy and care about, you know?

Digging a few boxes out of my storage unit in the garage today. Got to find the rest of my winter clothes (Current temp: 34 degrees) and then figure out where in the heck I put my plastic window wrap. The windows in my building are awful about letting in drafts, but I’m hesitant to turn the heat on until I find a job. :S

On the subject of money savers, I’m thinking of lowering my internet connection to the next speed down and cancelling my Blockbuster subscription. $48/mo is just too much to be paying for internet access, and $13/mo for movie rentals– while still a great rate– is simply more than I can justify. I forsee a lot of evenings in the near future that feature me trying to make out shapes on the one local channel that comes in- in rolling, static filled black and white- on my TV set. :S

blog_rabbitearsWhy is it that nobody seems to be able to pick up tv stations any more unless they have cable? And I’m not talking about all that HD crap and getting those boxes and everything. I’m talking about– Well don’t you remember how when you were a kid you could just turn the TV on and there were anywhere between 10 and 20 stations that came in crystal clear? It was wonderful! No need for cable, no need for fancy converter boxes. Maybe a set of rabbit ears was perched permanently atop your set, but that’s a cheap, one time purchase, and with enough tinfoil counterbalanced on the ends of the antennas you could be golden for years with those things.

But now… I remember when my family first moved into their current house in 2002 and couldn’t get a single station without getting cable. I mean: NOTHING. Even went out and bought a fancy, expensive antenna to attach to the set (cheaper than cable!) and still they got ZERO reception even on local channels.

I never thought I could cancel movies AND fast internet. I thought I was too weak!

But Blockbuster? Yep. This will be my last month. *sigh* It was nice while it lasted. :P

It’s a Zen thing, like how many babies fit in a tire.


I recently caught up on several movies that I’m surprised I didn’t see sooner. I guess by now I should be used to the fact that I’m always a bit behind, but how long ago did “No Country For Old Men” come out and it was this huge hit and I’m just now seeing it for the first time?

Movie #1: House on Haunted Hill (with commentary by Mike Nelson)

The first thing you need to know about this movie is that it is not nearly as scary nor as cool as its movie poster featuring a hot dead broad dangling at the end of a death metal skeleton’s noose. Oh sure it’s got Vincent Price in it, and that alone is worth a few Creep Points. But that factor aside it’s so poorly written, poorly acted, and hokey in its production value that it really is only good for playing in the background at a Halloween party.

Viewed from that angle, however, it’s an awesome movie good for loads of laughs. I got a total kick out of it, particularly for having watched it with Nelson’s commentary running through the whole thing. For sheer movie/story value I’d be hard pressed to give it even 1.5 out of 5 stars, but for background entertainment value I’d gladly give it 3 out of 5. Accompanied by a black plastic cauldron of Al Dobyns’ wop it earns an easy 6 out of 5.

Movie #2: Transformers

I don’t ever need to see this movie again.

It was fun, a lot of the effects were cool, blah blah blah. I expected all that, and it delivered precisely to the level of my expectations and not a step beyond. Maybe if I knew more about visual effects or something I’d see more to appreciate, but as the average, uneducated-ish viewer: this is where I stand. Not impressed, not unimpressed. Just… pressed.

What I didn’t expect was that it was easily about a half hour longer than it needed to be, and that it was possible for me to become even more uncomfortable at the sight of Megan Fox than I already was. My perverse pleasure in her alleged acne scars is something ugly and petty which I thoroughly detest in myself, especially since I have scars of my own, but which I’m happy to feed as long as she continues to call the tramping around she did in most of her scenes in this movie the actions of a strong feminist character. Please…

Shia LaBeouf was fine, but I’m not as taken with him as it would seem from popular media as I’m supposed to be. What’s the attraction with this kid? What’s the pull? Selena Gomez would give up her Jo Bro for this little dude? Come on, Sel. Let’s get serious here. Here’s a curly haired, seemingly well intentioned kid who can’t seem to stop getting himself into life threatening jams. You can do better

In conclusion: Vehicles that transform themselves into towering, kickass robots from outer space are awesome and it’s all a great idea and I’m sure I’ll see the next installment and enjoy a great deal of it the same way I enjoy a great deal about other noisy summer blockbusters. But as with this one: it’s a one-time-viewing kind of flick and ultimately forgettable.

Movie #3: No Country For Old Men

I have to think about this one a little more before I write too much about it. It’s one of those where I’m still trying to decide if I loved it, or if it was just a beautifully well-made and brilliantly acted/directed time passer. I don’t quite understand how it’s possible to still be riding the fence between those two options, but here I am.

I will say… expand upon… whatever… that I thought the acting was incredible, and much of the cinematography breathtaking. Tommy Lee Jones has this way of making roles like this *his* role and was, as usual, a pleasure to watch. I’m still not totally sold on Josh Brolin in the Llewelyn Moss role, but Javier Bardem as Anton Chigurh was far and away one of the most painfully perfect casting choices I’ve ever encountered in a tragic drama.

I will never look at shoe scuffs on linoleum the same way ever again.

Movie #4: The Good Girl

I’m not a huge Jennifer Aniston fan, nor much of a Jake Gyllenhaal fan either, so I’m still trying to figure out what exactly possessed me to pick this one up from the library the other day. Especially when I thought it was going to run the “light-hearted but touching RomCom” route. Not really a genre I tend to enjoy or watch intentionally, but I was all drama-ed out and my next disc of Battlestar Galactica hadn’t arrived yet, so I figured: why not end the day with something sweet?

G’head and laugh at me on this one. I deserve it. This is what i get for not reading the back of the box. Though to be fair the cover design on this one doesn’t really fit the genre. I still should’ve read the box(!!), but I accept only partial responsibility for being so horribly wrong in my expectations because seriously? That cover design? Misleading in the extreme!

I’m not going to get into the plot too much because I have so little to say about the movie that I’m afraid I’ll just give things away for the sake of saying something. I *will* say that I wasn’t that impressed and will continue to be unenthusiastic about Aniston and Gyllenhaal for the time being.

Movies #5 and 6: Clue and Waiting for Guffman

I’m including these because I’ve rewatched both recently– “Clue” I’ve rewatched maaaany many many times in the past few months– and every time I do I catch something new.

Just the other day I discovered a new conflict for Mr. Green and I mean to tell ya: It rocked my world.

You can keep your Shia LaBeoufs, your Vincent Prices, and even your Javier Bardems. So long as I’ve got my Madeline Kahns and Parker Poseys I’m good to go.

“Dorris Tanner just likes horses…”


Should an opportunity arise to ever take part in “The Children’s Hour” in any capacity I shall be forced to turn down said opportunity on the grounds that I will not survive the run. This is almost harder to watch than “The Crucible“!

OHMYGODISTHISDRIVINGMECRAZY!!!

Why can’t the old woman listen to them? Why does she refuse to entertain the possibility that she’s wrong? That her awful wretch of a granddaughter who always lies might’ve been lying about this as well? Or that Lily is a crazy, stupid, self-centered old hag?

And ohhhhh mah Looooooord I want to smack! that Mary child and push! her off the balcony. Slap her lousy lying face and put her out in the street where she belongs! *whining, obnoxious, lying little…*

GAH!! I hate movies like this!

I didn’t know this is what I was in for when I rented it from the library. I just saw it on the shelf, and I’d heard folks talking about having done this play but had never seen it so I picked it up, and now I want to go to every elementary school in the area and ask who all the little girl bullies are and knock their heads together. Them and all the yellow bellied, scream-crying little gnats that let themselves be pushed around by them.

Why is this making me so mad? Am I just getting too much caffeine? Goodness’ sake… But have you seen this thing, though? I mean, really!

And real life is hard too, right now.

7:37 pm? Bed time already?

One day I will be old, and my life will be ending, and I will wish for my youth again, but I will never wish to revisit 2008. Or 2009. Or 2010…

ETA: The movie just ended.

The universe owes me an apology.

If you’re gay, or sensitive, or God help you if you’re both, don’t watch this movie with me because I am going to be screaming so loudly at the screen about injustice and being who you are the whole time that you’ll just leave in emotional shambles vowing never to watch another movie with me because it’s just too draining.

RUTH SMAAAA*yawn*AAASH


You know that part in “Princess Bride” where the albino coughs out “the depths of despaaaaair”? That line has been in my head all day. That and “some I murder, some I let go.” At least the second line can be sung, and it helps to have music… in something… somewhere…

The depths of despair. I’m in them.

And then there’s this nonsense for when you need the world to make just a little less sense

1) Does this face look like the face of any woman you’ve ever known two months after giving birth (nsfw)?

2) Do these arms look like the arms of any woman you’ve ever known in any capacity ever?

3) This body. How is this body… existing? Where’s the justice? I know these people have all the time and money in the world and can just skip out on being normal people and devote countless hours and dollars to improving their appearance and I shouldn’t get too upset about it when it’s not really a level playing field.

But I can’t help it!

This just makes me angry. It makes me furious. It makes me want to scream and throw things! I hate this. And as much as I hate to say it, I’m really beginning to hate her, too. To hate all of them. Every last one.

I know I know– they’re “nice people,” “friendly,” “so down to earth for Hollywood,” blah blah blah. At this point: I Do. Not. Care. The world isn’t Hollywood. Stop teaching us to strive for and value only those things which are Un-real and not of ultimate importance anyway. Stop dangling unattainable perfection in front of us at every corner , all the while forcing the implication that it is not only possible but also necessary.

Boy I tell ya’– if that town burns down I will mourn the loss of the classic nostalgia pieces, and laugh with joy that the seat of this industry is in chaos. I know I know– I have friends who make their living off of this industry in different ways. But what they do isn’t “Hollywood.” It isn’t this nonsense. They make art, not “Naked Teenage Cheerleader Exhibitionist Lingerie Models Being Attacked by Equally Naked Lesbian Vampires With A Penchant for Busting Hip Hop Moves Before Attacking.” My friends don’t need Hollywood.

But then, with the direction things are going there: Who really does anymore?

The problem I have with being fed such a constant diet of people/images like this one of Alba, this one of Fox to the right (this is her after being instructed to gain 10 lbs…) is that it’s like– Okay. It’s like this:

It’s like eating strawberry flavored candy that has 10 x the strawberry taste of the real thing. You still like natural strawberries (especially if you can dress them up with sugar or chocolate or whipped cream…), but after a while even as good as they are they’re just not sweet enough to quench this desire you’ve cultivated for that intense, ultra-sweet, strawberry flavor. The candy contains traces of the real thing, sure. But it’s all so processed and there’s so much added to it that a real piece of fruit just doesn’t have, that you really can’t compare the two.

But that’s what happens with this glut of these people/images always before us. There’s so much that you can add into these people’s lives that you just can’t have with regular people- the heaps of sugar and the Red No. 3. But when we’re fed such a constant, steady diet of the way they are, the way they behave, look, dress, talk– we think it’s attainable because they’re human and we’re human and we’re told we’re all equal so… But the similarities end there. We *can’t* be like them. Men are told to want them, women are taught to want to be them. But it’s impossible.

I’m afraid I will never be loved for being a real strawberry. For something else I “really” am? Sure. But for being a real strawberry? Seems less likely every time another celebrity bounces back post-partum.

And I feel bad for every last person who can’t enjoy real strawberries any more, because I know they’re still good, no matter how sweet (eye)candy can be.

Enough already. Enough empty shaking of fists. It’s just a front, isn’t it? Isn’t it always.

You know what the problem really is? The problem really is that I want things in my life to start working, and my greatest fear is that everything that isn’t working, that everything that’s falling apart is falling apart because of me. Because of something I’ve done. Or something I’ve neglected to do. Like everything’s crashing and it’s all my fault. My big, fat, lazy, selfish, narcissistic, stupid, guilty fault.

*******

ETA: I’ve gotten a surprising amount of feedback on what was intended to just be a nice, blow-off-loads-of-steam little rant, but most of it in the form of private messages from guys ‘n’ gals of all ages and backgrounds on Facebook so I’m the only one getting to enjoy the incredibly beautiful, hope-inspiring, and utterly refreshing sentiments these little notes contain. But to each of you who’s voiced their opinions on these topics- you guys rock, and it should be little wonder why I call you each a friend. :)

“May I help you with anything else, Mr. P’jones?”


I’m watching the special features on Galaxy Quest (hooray library DVDs!) and the supporting cast is full of surprises.

Rainn Wilson is in it as one of the tag-along aliens, ‘cept he has maybe two lines in the whole thing (aside from a few that only made it as far as the deleted scenes), as is Dian Bachar of all things Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Then there’s Justin Long as a nerdy kid who helps save the day, and Corbin Bleu portraying one of the main characters when he was a kid (no joke: have they lightened his skin for all those High School Musical movies?).

Next up: Guess Who with Bernie Mac and Ashton Kutcher. Watch it tonight? Save it for tomorrow? Still debating.

Is it still only Monday? No- it’s Tuesday. Right? Is it Tuesday. I’m not kidding: I literally have no idea when I am right now. None.

Calendar check: It’s tuesday. And Tuesday means: Just put in the second movie and stop all this back and forth.

Ooh. A preview for Rent. Good good goody. >:| We’re off to a great start…

I’m still trying to decide on a layout for this blog. I’ve found a few I like, but they all auto-insert widgets I don’t want and I don’t know how to get rid of them, or I want them but don’t know how to move them around.

How do I make ten thousand dollars by the end of the month?

Not that I am in some kind of desperate situation and in need of an immediate $10K so please don’t start emailing me asking what disaster has befallen me! It would just be awesome to have $10K in the next 20 days. Heck- I’d even settle for half that. See? I’m reasonable.

In other news: The picture to the right? What is this: Attila the Gyllenhaal? Jake the Hun?

For some reason this image makes me feel absurdly uncomfortable on so. many. levels.

What the crap is this all about anyway? Are they filming a warrior flick or vacationing? And how is it that he looks like a 3rd century eastern European mountain man and she looks like an underpaid baby-sitter in the Hamptons?

ETA: Apparently I was so totally right in my line of questioning about Jake G. Are any of us surprised? I should think not!

6/17/08 Firefox 3 Beta Release


Running the Firefox 3 Beta and so far I’m digging it.

Love the “Awesome Bar” and the bigger “back” button.

ETA: OMG, dawgs. So. Much. Faster.

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I’m watching “AFI’s Top Ten Top Tens” with my folks and so far it’s enjoyable, but there are some commentary actor choices I just don’t understand.

1) JESSICA FREAKING ALBA: What does she know? About anything at all? What does she have to say about movies that’s worth hearing? She’s a mediocre actress (I cringe to say that knowing she’s better than I am and will always be infinitely more successful than most people I will ever know), a painfully mediocre interview, and kind of a dip. She seems like a nice enough dip, but still: she’s a dip all the same. Let’s hear from someone with something relevant to say.

2) JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT: Almost as bad as Alba showing up on this list, but at least she’s done more and done it better than Alba ever has. But “I Still Know What You Did last Summer”– aaaaalmost unforgivable. Like “Rise of the Silver Surfer” unforgivable. Almost.

3) Vanessa Williams: Um… what? Whatever. Who cares. Whatever.

And then there are the interview/commentary choices that totally make sense- Isabella Rossalini, George Lucas, James Earl Jones, Lesleyann Warren.

And every time I see Ray Liotta I picture the top of his skull being removed, leaving his brain exposed to be eaten by Anthony Hopkins.

But geez– Jessica Alba? Why don’t we just make Justin Timberlake president of the Academy and call it a day.