Tres Audiciónes

After a weird ’07/’08 theatre slump, in which for the life of me I couldn’t find as much as usual in the local circuit I wanted to audition for, I currently have three auditions coming up in January alone. Sweeeet! Let’s hope that proves to be a trend for the rest of 2009, eh?

And before anybody starts whinin’ or gripin’ or finger waggin’: I had a blast with the shows I did in ’07/’08. I’m not knockin’ ’em. There was just this weird chunk of time in late ’07 and mid ’08 where there weren’t as many options that were enticing to me personally as there generally are around here.

Below is a li’l vloggy vid about the stuff I’ve got coming up. Below *that* is a testament to my inability to present anything in a non-redundant fashion. (Basically I just fleshed out the video with what I actually wanted to say but which I couldn’t capture on video without it getting all  rambly and obnoxious.)

Actually: It *did* get rambly and obnoxious. Go figure. I cut it down from 14 minutes  of thinking out loud, so for those of you who’d feel bad pressing play on the video, but then not finishing it when you saw how freaking LONG it was (but would sit through it anyway just to be nice): You’re welcome.

The Part Where I Repeat What I Just Said In the Video, But More Wordier Like

The first show I’m auditioning for is a farce at a theatre I’ve worked with a few times before and have really enjoyed. I’m excited because if it works out it’ll be tons of fun to work on and loads of laughs to perform in, and that’s an enormous part of why I do theatre in the first place: To have a good time. If it ain’t fun, I ain’t interested. (Not that it has to be a comedy, or that there can’t be hard work, or anything like that. I *heart* dramas and hard work! It’s just got to be worth the time and the money I put into it, and some shows/theatres just aren’t worth the sacrifice.)


Backstage for "The Philadelphia Story"

You can keep your divas and your politics and your drama to yourself, thankyouverymuch. Me? I’m looking to have me a swell old time. And a farce at a great place with wonderful people? What’s sweller than that? Oh man– and jumping from a period comedy in fall to a farce in winter? How fun would that be?!

I only know of one other actor who is also for sure auditioning for this one, but he’s very kickass and funny and all that good stuff, so if I could get into it alongside him and one other fellow I’m also crossing my fingers about, then DAYUM! That’d be an awesome time. :D

The next show I’m auditioning for is a black comedy at a theatre I’ve never worked with before, but with a director I *have* worked with before, so we’ll see how many butterflies I bring with me to that one. It’s a long shot among long shots for me, but I welcome the opportunity with open arms and a big ol’ grin. ‘Cause see– that’s the thing about auditioning for parts that are long shots: That audition may be the closest you ever get to performing in any of those roles, right? So you may as well enjoy every moment of it as much as you can, right? Right.


Half of the "Wait Until Dark" cast... and C.J. ...

The final audition I have coming up is the Milwaukee General Audition near the end of the month. That one’s a bit tricker in that you can’t book a time slot for it until January 19th at 9 am, all the slots are taken by 10 am, and the audition is only about a week later. This translates to having to have headshots printed before you even know if you’ll even need them, monologues prepared which you may not end up using, (though having headshots and monologues at the ready is not a bad thing by any means), and if you’re fortunate enough to be employed *quashes waves of jealousy* then you have to ask off for that entire day long before even the call-in day on 19th, when in the end you may end up being free for work that day after all if no spots are left by the time they get to you.

That MGA… *tsk tsk tsk* She’s a tricksy mistress, no?

The pluses about the MGAs are that you’re allowed to attend for up to two years in a row, there are representatives present from 15-25 theatres, agencies, etc. (16 this year), and even if you don’t get any calls out of it you’re still being seen, and that’s worth a lot.

Just try not to get too bummed out when you find out someone with zero inclination toward acting and no availability that season gets a time slot, and you who act for a living weren’t able to get one. Ha ha, sucka…

I wonder if I could act for a living. Would it alter my perspective on performance to a point that I wouldn’t be able to relax in it as much? Hm. Maybe it would make me enjoy it even more. Hm again.

Question about headshots: I only have 3 or 4 copies left of my headshot, and I need a total of at least 16 by late January for the MGAs. I’m broke as Lindsay Lohan’s moral compass, so going out and getting a bunch of prints made- no matter how good the deal!- is probably out of the question for me at this current time. But I also can’t just pop photo paper into my parents’ printer and expect anything reasonably useable to come out. (Plus they’d be 8 1/2″ x 11″ instead of 8″ x 10″ that way, a definite no-go, and I don’t know if I trust myself with scissors enough to trim them.) Suggestions for affordable alternatives?


ermine-2I had a dream last night where I was outside in the snow and this gorgeous, pure white ferret came running up to me wanting to play. She looked like a standard albino except that her eyes were black and her hair felt more like thick rabbit fur. She was crawling all over me, she came when I called her (her name was Virginia), and she was just the friendliest most charming little mustelid you’ve ever met.

I was with my Mimi at some point shortly after that and we were walking into a house that I believe belonged to people related to us. The house was in total disarray, no one appeared to be inside, and the back door was wide open. When Mimi went to look out the back door to see if our family members were outside, Virginia jumped out of my arms and started running away into one of the nearby bedrooms. I ran in after her and scooped her up before she could get lost in a pile of clothes under the bed. I stood there holding her and laughing, talking that silly talk you use with babies and small animals, when I noticed she now had patches of dark gray in the fur on her belly, had completely lost control of her bowels, and was bleeding.

I started crying and running through the house trying to find Mimi to ask her what I should do while this delicate thing in my hands wriggled and chittered at me. I didn’t know what might’ve happened to her before she’d found me and I’d only had her for a few minutes so I didn’t know if she was ill or had a history of being abused or anything.  Images and conversations began flooding through my brain about her previous owners and I knew they had treated her terribly and had tested different chemicals and drugs and things on her. Not for science, not for medicine. For ignorance; for spite.

In these visions I saw her poor little belly filled with metal and germs. It was sad. It was awful. This poor, soft, defenseless, friendly little thing, bleeding in my hands, was totally unsaveable. God it was just awful.

I woke up before she could die.

And now that I’m depressed over the death of an animal that doesn’t exist, and you’re wondering how we ever became friends in the first place, how ’bout a quick subject change so we can still part on decent terms?


New Year’s resolutions. Got any? List ’em in the comments below. I don’t know as I plan on getting into all that hoo-hah myself, but we’ll see…

You are collectively my “It’s Complicated”

Shot a… um… a “thing” today for a health show on Lifetime, but I’m sleepy and it’s not a terribly exciting story so I’ll save it for later. In fact- I’m saving everything for later. Screw story, screw format, screw points of interest. Bah! Bah, I say! I’m here, it’s late, I’m exhausted but still up. Time to traverse the web and bring back links for my readers and friends.

Will the links be awesome?


Should you like them just because I did?

Of course.

Is our friendship effectively over if you don’t visit at least two of the links provided?


And so it begins…

College Humor

The first few links are from, an exceptionally funny site. But no fair following these links and getting distracted by other links on their page. You’ll leave the rest of the links here feeling all left behind and lonely… and unwanted… and unloved… and a little fat…

Viral Video Politician: “A Presidential candidate does his best to get views for his video.”

If The Other Party Wins: “One thing’s for sure: the person you disagree with is going to ruin the country.”

Hardly Working: The New Girl: “Facebook changes everything.”


Moving right along to my second love (after Barraco’s), is YouTube. Ah YouTube. Eternal fount of all things embeddable and mind-numbing.

Tiny Tim singing Rod Stewart’s “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy”

Shuga Lee Lewis singing Jerry Lee Lewis’s “Great Balls of Fire”

I’m almost embarrassed to admit how much I laughed at and enjoyed that second one. And I didn’t even forward through it. Heck no. Watched the whole thing. Twice.

“A mark, a yen, a buck, or a pound”

Our Tax System Explained: Bar Stool Economics: “Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this…”

Milton Friedman discussing the concept of Greed on Donahue in ’79

The American Recession as Explained By a Canadian: “Much like breasts, economies can never be too large, which is why it’s important that they’re always slowly growing, and one of a few reasons why we’re so disappointed that breasts don’t.”

And so we can end this blog entry joining together in a few moments of “Holy. Freaking. Crap.”: Smart People Stuff…

Science and Technology

The Ghost In Your Genes: Basically says that stuff you do may find a way into your genes and get passed on to the kiddies. Wowza.

Children’s Faces As They Play Video Games: Minus any commentary from me one way or the other, or advocating or denouncing anything from the article itself, I’m including this link for the sole purpose of linking you to this kinda crazy video footage.

What Color Eyes Would Your Children Have?: I think this is how I’m going to determine who I have kids with- you know, in the event that I should decide I’m a sadist- so I’m guaranteed to have green eyed offspring. Because let’s be honest here: Don’t green eyes rock harder than any other eye color?

That’s it. I’m all learned/laughed out. You’re on your own from here.


I fell behind on my video blogging, and then I got tagged by Tia D and made three videos. See, Tia D? You’re all it takes to get me on a(n obnoxious) vlogging roll!

Video #1: My response to Tia D.

The deal is you have to make a video response sharing 5 things about yourself. I s’ppose ideally you’ll also tag other people to make response videos of their own, but I don’t really know that many folks on YouTube likely to make a response video to one of mine so I guess you can consider this me tagging you if you like.

Video #2: WordPress Search Terms

If you have a WordPress blog you’re probably familiar with the Blog Stats tracking features. If you’re not yet familiar with them then you should be because they’re awesome. One of the things WP allows you to track are what search terms people plug into Google that bring them to your blog.

I decided I wanted to make a Wordle image of the search terms that bring people to my blog so I’ve been pasting them into an Excel document so I can more easily alphabetize them and see just how frequently some of them come up because some of them reappear a LOT.

The following is a video listing of some of the more common, or more unusual, things people have looked up that have brought them here. Among them: bloody ducks, the first sin was intercourse, Megan Fox unclothed, skinny naked lesbians, high cost of asphalt shingles, nude photos Karen Kay third shift, tea can do many things Jane but it can’t bring back the dead,  and Dunlap Syndrome.

ETA: It just gets worse and worse and worse…

See: “Could Megan Fox Be Any More Perfect?” My favorite user comment on the article comes from someone who goes by “The Truth” who says: “All the females hate her! Why? Simple * it’s because they all want to look like her, but can’t Instead, they are plain, ugly, unattractive, fat, stupid losers. All the guys want their girlfriends to look half as good as her.”

Don’t bother telling me you love me if you just wish I was somebody else. Especially somebody else who’s just so… so impossible to mimic.

Video #3: “The Philadelphia Story”

I’m in a show that opens in November at a theatre here in town. Good times. The last time I was in a show I made a video I could post in different places to give people info on it. Figured I’d just keep that tradition alive…


In other news: The job search continues and I’m still painfully under or over qualified for every job I’m finding. People keep saying how there aren’t that many job openings out there, but that doesn’t seem to be the case where I’m looking. The problem for me so far is just that the jobs are all a poor match for my skill set. Not that I’d particularly mind being overqualified for a position if it was something I could just relax and enjoy, but 1) I know I’d go bonkers after two days of bagging groceries, and 2) those jobs don’t pay enough to cover my bills. :S

Where’s a good sugar daddy when you need one?

I’ve got until mid-December to find work, at which point my unemployment insurance runs out and I’m up a particularly dense creek without adequate means of propulsion.

And now, a message to my politically minded friends (of which I have many) who keep sending me emails (by the terabyte) about the November elections:

Don’t assume we’re voting the same way when sending me politically themed emails, or that the praise you’re forwarding for your candidate of choice sounds any less like the brainwashed silliness you complain about from “the other side.” For every “My Party’s Candidate Is A God Among Men!” link you send me that glows over your candidate of choice I have one that glows in an equally flashy and abrasive manner over mine while debunking everything your videos and links just plugged. Let’s just leave it at “we’re even” and assume nothing we say to each other will change the other’s mind. Because let’s face it: It won’t.

I could really use some Easy Mac…

Waukesha Flood Pictures

Before putting together the video from the last entry I had to get my editing stuff together, and I realized as I did so that I pretty much do the same stuff every time I sit down to edit videos, so I figured I’d make a video of how I make videos.

:P *plbbbbbbbt*

I got all that together intending to do work on video footage I got today of the flooding in Waukesha, but it was kind of a daunting task what with all the video I took, and the one with Bekah and Patches just needed a title page and a quick fade, so I ditched the harder one in favor of the Bekah/Patches one. *meh* What can I say- I’m lazy. And those two girls are just so darn cute!

I’ve moved on to “Kon-Tiki” and will start on the flood videos later, but for now, a few pictures from my walk through Waukesha this afternoon…

[Image 1 of 4] The blue line indicates how far the edge of the river generally reaches if the water is very high in the Spring time.

The red line indicates where the path leads under the bridge.

There’s generally clearance of about 8′ at that point (currently only about 1.5 ft), allowing you to walk comfortably beneath the bridge, yet to still be close enough to the underside of it for taller walking companions to threaten you with loosened, and therefore angered, spiders from the bridge webs.


And this is nothing. The water is so high that at the next bridge down the river there is NO clearance whatsoever. I stood with a woman and her two daughters as we watched a fallen tree wrestle its way under the zero clearance bridge and out the other side. Pretty crazy…

[Image 2 of 4] All of the walkways in the area are completely submersed.

Submersed? Submerged?

Anyway… The water in the picture to the right– can you see how far down that black railing reaches? There’s still more to it; it finishes a few feet farther down below the water. This is one of the sidewalks that lines the river. This *is* the River Walk.

Scary to think all the gross trash that’s going to be dredged up and left behind on these walkways when the water finally recedes. :P

I was actually just down on this particular riverwalk on Friday night with friends and I remember marveling at all of the leaves and sticks and things that had been left behind on it from previous storms the week before. Negligible now. :S

[Image 3 of 4] The red line indicates how much farther down the stairs go beneath the water.

The blue line indicates how far the river generally reaches when there’s the usual amount of high river swelling.

(The structure on the dry land above the flooding is the downtown Waukesha bus terminal stop, and just beyond that is Fave Local Townie Bar.)

[Image 4 of 4] And you know those three bear statues down near the river?

Well the bears finally got their wish: they’re playing deep in the river!

I *think* I’ve circled where the middle bear is. The water is so deep right now that it’s almost completely covered. Sometimes a current will adjust just so and you can catch a glimpse of the top of it’s shoulders, but that’s about it.

As for the other two- *grins*- best fishing they’ve ever had!

I love those statues. They’re actually the reason I wanted to go down there today to get pictures. Kurt Magoon posted some in his Flickr stream, taken at a point in the flooding when you could still actually see the bears, and I just *had* to get down there to see them for myself.

Best part of the river today. :)

Ridiculosity. From the root “icu” meaning “there you are!”

Well: It’s a toss up.

I embed videos in my blog and people watch them and leave comments in the blog but never on the video’s page, which leaves the video’s page looking all empty, lonely, and unloved.

I link to videos in my blog and fewer people watch them and then leave no comments at all so I don’t know who it is that’s watching.

And I like to know because, you know, I want to be aware so I’m not– so I don’t– I’ll make the same video, but if I know my grandma’s watching it (because apparently she is, according to my mom) then I’m going to be a bit more selective in my language or whatever, you know? Just a “for example.”

And I don’t see it as self-censorship to use one word instead of another because I know lots of words. I did Word Clues.

My first Word Clues word? “Tomahawk” from “tom” meaning “to cut.” Melissa Prah came up with that word when she wrote it in my WC notebook to show me an example of how to do the assignments when I switched into Mrs. W’s class freshman year after spending first semester in Mrs. L’s class.

Yeah. They put me in Mrs. L’s class first semester because I wanted to take Art (offered during Mrs. W’s English class time slot) and they assumed my new interest in an elective ought to supersede my placement in one of the academic classes I also wanted to take. *sigh*


I was Stumbling and saw this quiz for “What Drug Should I Try?” and I haven’t take a quiz in ages so I took it and apparently I should try LSD.

Runner up: Ecstasy

The bronze: ‘Shrooms

Holding up LSD’s flower garland to keep it from brushing the ground: Alcohol

Distant 5th: Pot

The heck?


I’m officially addicted to Polyvore.

Before I used to play Solitaire while on hold on the phone or while watching a boring movie which I can’t turn off because there’ll be nothing else to do. Now instead I’m on Polyvore throwing outfits together.

What I love is creating something super cute and discovering every piece is available from a store I already shop at and the prices on everything are reasonable except for the flower hair clip or the socks or something. They’ll turn out to be $400 Prada socks, or a $250 Jimmy Choo hair clip designed to match a specific pair of shoes from a line that’s been discontinued and is only available used from a style blog out of Austria so you need a translator to navigate the check out page.

Fashion is ridiculous.


Work was hard today.

I’m anxious to start a new job, but am a little afraid, too. There’s always been the family business to fall back on. Now I’m afraid no one else will want me. Or that they’ll think I’m under qualified and not pay me enough for me to pay my bills. Or worse that they’ll think I’m over qualified and either not hire me at all or put me in a higher position that I’m not ready for just because my job responsibilities at the family co. were big ones.


This is nutso. I’m going to bed.

“I had to have it!”


I have to have this!

Any color will do! I’m a medium (probably)!

Also: I just subscribed to this girl today. Ohmygosh her videos are hilarious. The one with her nephew and the hair gel and her nephew and the crab are funny in that “ohhhh yeah family” way. Which is great. :) (Dang, though. That crab one– kid looks terrified!!)

She’s just so energetic and cute and funny and you know what? I need that right now. I need to see regular people being fun and having fun. And her? She’s fun. :D

Blushing Walrus

Watching Joyeux Noel and indulging the faux-Swede in me by munchin’ on some Anna’s ginger cookies. They remind me of Christmases at Grandma and Grandpa’s house on the island; of the dining room table filled with bowls of various doughs and batters and sprinkles and powdered sugar, and the rolls of wax paper, and cookie cutters, and pans with rusted edges, and the kitchen hot from the oven, and classical music coming in from the living room, and Grandma bustling around keeping everything moving along while showing Bekah and me how to make all different kinds of traditional Swedish cookies and treats.

I don’t really know what I am other than German, but I’ll always have a soft spot in my heart for the Swedes. :)

Got a call from In Tandem yesterday about volunteering this week for the UPAF thing at State Fair, and about volunteering to usher for “Mass Appeal.” I’ll have to check to see when I’m free for that. I like volunteering for them. And seeing the show for free? Well that’s nice too! ;)

In an interesting and cheering turn of events, Jane also called to let me know I’m one of the folks they’re going to be calling about auditioning for one of their shows next spring. I think it goes up in April. Or maybe it’s that the audition is in April. Whatever– very neat. :D

I just hope it doesn’t overlap with the things I’m interested in trying out for at Sunset and Civic. I know the competition will be pretty tough for the In Tandem show so it’s not really that likely to come about, but still, if it does work out I’d hate to see it replace the opportunity to work with two other theatres I’ve so enjoyed working with. Especially with the rough time Sunset is having. I don’t want to miss out on a chance to work there one last time (if that’s what it comes to for them), even though the In Tandem show would pay.

A lot.

I wish I spoke French. I’m watching an interview with the J.N. director and the sound of his language is just fascinating.

Why do we fight? How do you convince people with fact, with honesty, that they ought to go shoot someone? I call we switch to hand-to-hand combat between the people running the countries that are fighting. Maybe give ’em a month to train, first. You know: give the old white guys at least somewhat of a chance so things are a bit more even (otherwise it’s just no fun to watch), and then put ’em in the ring and say ‘All right, you guys duke it out. We’re gonna go have a sandwich. And we want this figured out by the time we get back. You don’t *have* to fight, you can talk, too. Just, you know, figure it out. We’ll have dessert after our sandwiches; give ya’ a little extra time…’

Mmmm… sandwich… Gotta go!


Why have a sandwich when you can have mac ‘n’ cheese?

Watching March of the Penguins with Alfred. He’s into penguins. Penguins ‘n’ narwhals, but penguins mostly.

I’m with Alfred– Penguins are pretty cool. We learned about them in fourth grade. With Miss D. Good times.

Too bad we don’t do our best “mate attracting” when our bellies are so full they’re distended. Lucky penguins…

In other news, my YouTube videos have been watched a cumulative total of 1,996 times. Weird, no? They’re long, rambly, and about nothing of any relevance or import. At all. Ever. 1,996. And I haven’t posted a new one in over 3 months, so the timing is weird, too.

I’d still be posting if I had a better recording program. I don’t know how to record video using my built-in webcam. *sigh* I know… I know… I’m an idiot… I just haven’t really done much looking around for programs I can use, and the only thing I’ve already got on hand is the program that goes with my crappy Logitech cam that I bought last fall and refuse to use.

Man… these penguins are kinda sweet and romantic… And those two are totally gettin’ it on… I should probably cover Alfred’s eyes for this part. :P Gotta go!